It has been reported recently in the New York Times that those who talk deeply are happier. I’ve assumed this at some level and have always had a desire to engage deeply in conversations. Blogging about finding balance and meaning is my way of talking deeply (and not) to anyone willing to read my muses.
Finding others with such an interest is not very common, particularly in the dating scene I experienced. Small talk can get boring fast if it doesn’t lead to more depth. To engage in deep conversations, people have to be willing to expose themselves at some level.
The article states that “substantive conversation seemed to hold the key to happiness for two main reasons:
human beings are driven to find and create meaning in their lives
we are social animals who want and need to connect with other people.
By engaging in meaningful conversations, we manage to impose meaning on an otherwise pretty chaotic world. And interpersonally, as you find this meaning, you bond with your interactive partner, and we know that interpersonal connection and integration is a core fundamental foundation of happiness.”
If talking deeply has not been your thing, you can experiment by trying to do some more every day and see how you feel, perhaps with your significant other. You may find that you two become more intimate. If you are male, I can almost assure you of it as a female. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a female friend complain that her mate spoke too deeply with her.
I hadn’t expected to be nursing a fractured hand at the beginning of April, along with related lifestyle changes. This includes not driving. Today marks the two-week anniversary of my fall fracturing my hand and also of not driving. I probably haven’t driven for longer but it was good to know that I could. I have also had to have help doing some basic things like opening a jar and anything requiring two hands. Most significantly, I’ve had to have help caring for Maya.
For the first week following the accident, I leaned on Colin during his Spring break. He maintained a good attitude while helping to carry her up and down the stairs, in and out of her high chair and even during diaper changes. He held her down with his eyes closed and holding his breath while I used my right hand for the dirty work. Although it wasn’t an ideal Spring break for him, it was probably healthy for him to be needed and to be helpful to his old lady! I have to get him trained for when I’m older.
This past week, we have been able to utilize the assistance of a 23 year-old neighbor who has not been working. It’s been a good match since she has been able to make some money while we are getting some flexible help. As an added bonus, we got to know of some general babysitting assistance for when we are ready to go date. We may end up with a choice of four sitters, whereas two weeks ago, we knew of no one in the area. We had canceled potentially seeing our favorite singer, Michael Buble, perform as a result.
Over-all, I am trying to take each day as it comes and stay occupied with my interests along with my family responsibilities. I added to my writing tasks right after the fall, by joining Examiner among other projects. I don’t want to focus on the setback with my hand. I want to focus on all that I have and on moving forward. I will do what I can with one hand and will just be more efficient with two.
Tomorrow, it will be one week since my surgery and I will be meeting with my surgeon. I expect that my bandage will be removed and then I imagine throwing up upon looking at the state of my hand. Right before the surgery, he told me he would use a plate instead of pins for my broken metacarpals and that it does not need to be taken out and that it would be noticeable. He also said he would use cadaver bone for the parts where my bone turned to powder. He said that although the cadaver bone has been tested, it could still have HIV. He said the cut area of the hand would protrude and then go down. Aggghhhh! I was hearing all this after being doped up and just pictured a monstrous hand after the surgery and that is what I’m imagining I’ll see tomorrow…
It is wonderful to think as we approach the Thanksgiving holiday, all that we are thankful for. It is good to think about that everyday, and Thanksgiving is a reminder for us to do that. The more thankful we are of elements in our life, the greater these elements will increase. It is part of the law of attraction. We will attract more to be thankful for. I am reminded of a story of two priests. They were in a similar situation. One cursed the situation around him, and the other was thankful for it. The one who was negative found himself in a bigger negative situation, while the positive one found much more to be thankful. It was as if God wanted to prove to both that things could be worse and that things could be much better, too.
I wish you all a happy Thanksgiving and hope that you are able to find much in your life to be grateful for and watch it multiply.
It has been reported recently in the New York Times that those who talk deeply are happier. I’ve assumed this at some level and have always had a desire to engage deeply in conversations. Blogging about finding balance and meaning is my way of talking deeply (and not) to anyone willing to read my muses.
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